| I'm telling you im a fakeeeee |
[07 Nov 2005|07:43pm] |
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mood |
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enthralled |
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music |
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It isnt worth my timeeee |
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Today was..interesting. Heh. Idk So many things happened that i was just not expecting. Idk Im wickedly confused on a certain situation and i just have absolutely no idea what to do. i mean for the past idk how many days now i've been talking about nothing but steve. I get all happy when he says 5 words to me and now this is happening. I mean i feel so bad, because i still really like steve. But when you think about it..What chance do i really have with him. I mean i could say no and then just waste all my time trying to get to steve to notice me and for what. What would be the point. And then i'd regret saying no. And feel like a retard. Of course, i dont think this option is actually the right one if im looking for something...serious. I mean, i am 15 so why should i be looking for anything serious anyway. Just have fun. Which i guess this option is. But i dont want to be signing myself up for a break up. Does that make sense? Idk it feels so werid now that i was just complaining in my last entry about how guys dont like me and i feel completely ugly and this happens. Ugh. Idk im trying not to get too happy because then i'll ruin it. Yeah idk if i'll be making the best choice if..im forced to pick an answer. Yeah im going into detail. Whatever. He was suppose to call and he hasnt. And im just so bored so like..I have nothing else to do but wait. Blah i feel wickedly tired too. But cant go to sleep. And i cant go online which suckkks. Because everytime i do go online someone calls. Lol. Yeah why cant i get that thing now. And not have to wait until my birthdayyy. Yeah my mind is just not..here. Woo. Let it bleeeed. Take red for what its worrrth. Borreedom. Maybe i'll just keep talking. Take up some time. No idea what to ramble about. Boyss boysss boyyys dont i talkk about anything else? Im such a looooser. Its really warm in here. It's almost 7..should i really be waiting?. Maybe i should take a bath. No. Hm. Eyes really hurt. Idk if i had english homework...hope not. I have to do my history still. Yeah i guess i should do that. Wooo.
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| Goodbye to you.. |
[06 Nov 2005|06:05pm] |
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Yeah. My mom is on the phone again. I hate it. She always complains that im on the phone for forever but shes on longer than i am. I mean the only time im ever on the phone is if angela calls or i need to ask ravin something. Idk. Its pointless. Today was soo..idk. I've been up since 5. I couldnt sleep too much on my mind. Get to that later. Watched the rest of south park season 4 that i had started last night. Then watcehd some Dawsons creek. Left at like 830 and got some breakfast. Mother felt the need to do a weeks worth of grocery shopping. Got home and undid all that. She made me do laundry and clean my room. Then i made my cake. That i realized i couldnt eat after i was halfway done because it was made out of dark chocolate. Nice one Britney. Left at like 1230 or maybe earlier to go somewhere with mom and paula. We ended up going to the parky thing. Walked for like an hour and a half. That was the time of my life. Went to McDonalds for like the first time in 12 years. Then came home and here i am. Showered. Did my math homework. Made dinner. And yeah. I just realized after typing all this out that i ate 3 meals today. Surprising.Oh yay. Mother is off the phone and now i get to conect to the little internet and stare at a bunch of screen names of people that dont talk to me. Poiiintlesss. Blah not like anyone is on anyway. Be lah. Therapy this week. Yippie. It used to help. Probably before my mom started getting into the whole thing of how its costing her too much money. Now i just feel like my problems arent really that bad when you have to repeat them out loud to someone. I sound so fucking stupid. Going on about how i feel like my mom hates me and how we have a mutual feeling on that. Or how i constantly get jealous of all of my friends and the only reason i ever want a boyfriend is so i actually feel like someone cares about me. Oh yeah. I dont sound like a total retard. Whats more stupid is that i put a link to my journal right in my info. So anyone out of boredom could be reading this. Coolness all the way. Idk maybe i should stop it. I mean its not the easiest thing to go there once a week or two or whatever and like just start naming every problem that goes on in my pathetic little life and have her give me her opinion on it her have her just stare at me like shes thinking about whats she wants at Dunkin Donuts when this stupid little 15 year old with annoying little problems leaves. Well its not her fault. Why should she care about me. Well we care paying her to care. But i guess she doesnt really have to. Would be nice. But not likely. Maybe i should just go back to being all emo and crying all the time. I complain enough. At least i felt somewhat comfortable with myself. I wasnt happy obviously. But i knew that i was Britney. Stupid little girl that wore too much black, and too much eyeliner, and listened to gay music, and goes around like shes ready to chop everyones head off that goes near her. It would be better than this little act that im putting on where i pretend to be happy. Its annoying to keep hearing my mother tell me that i choose how my day will turn out. If i go in with a bad attitude then i will have a bad day. Well you know what mom. My life sucks no matter if i look like im ready to punch someone or i hug them on sight and give them a flower. Im tired of hearing. 'Dont let people affect your emotions.' 'People shouldnt control your emotions.' 'You can control what happens in your life' Well fuck that. My life has sucked for the past 4 years. And before that i was kidd and the wrost thing that could of happened was that i forgot to turn in my money for lunch on monday. I hate freaking out over the dumbest things. But dr. Mom would say, 'You can control those things Britney'. Well obviously i missed that subject in school. How to fucking control what bothers you. Not to mention my self confidence is barely existent . i walk into school feeling like im the ugliest thing that could have step foot there. And the people i go to school with dont make me feel any better. Im surrounded by sluts and immature little boys. So why should i care what they think. Well its not like i have anyone else to think about. Im just surrounded by those poor excuses for human beings and my mother. And thats all i'll be surrounded by for the next year and like 9 months. And then i can leeeeeaveee. Finally. 'But no dont run away from your problems britney. Because they'll just follow you there' Yeah like a fucking puppy. Im very frustrated. Not like you couldnt tell. I hate being like this. I hate feeling like i have no friends. Even though i know i do. But when i need them whos there. When im freaking out like a complete psycho. Whos there? My fucking rabbit?. My mother who i wouldnt tell the time. I mean what good is a friend if when im going psycho and need to talk to them they're not there. And that is why i want a boyfriend. Because i have the really random moments, where i just freak out completely. And theres like this little part of me that thinks oh maybe if i have some stupid boy that acts half his age pretend to be my boyfriend and care about maybe i wont get like this. But of course what good are boys. They might be nice for the first few months. But they'll just break up with you or cheat on you or something. And then theres those lucky people who have those boyfriends that they dont seem to fight with. Or that seem to do everything right. And they buy each other little gifts and write little notes. And i get so freaking jealous. I hate being jealous. Sometimes i can control it and theres other times where i just want to throw somebody into a wall. I hate hearing how that girl is hott or whatever and then i just stand there like wow am i that freaking disgusting that not even some stupid excuse for a guy could think im somewhat good looking. But of course not. Why would anyone think im pretty. Im Britney. Almost forgot. ARGGGGGGGGGGGGH. I 150% hate being like this. But unlike everyone keeps telling me. I CANT FUCKING CONTROL IT. And i know that at this time tomorrow when im straightening my annoying hair i wont feel like this anymore. Tragic. Spend like 25 minutes typing out a journal entry that i wont even apply to me in 24 hours. Blah. Im sure i have an entry like this like a few weeks ago. Idk. Im sorry to whoever reads this. Im sorry for being a loser. Who has no confidence and thinks they;re ugly. And im sorry if your my friend. Im really sorry you have to deal with me.
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| Well you'll never find it. If you looking for it. |
[05 Nov 2005|03:31pm] |
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mood |
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 hungry |
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music |
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Cirrrlesssss |
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Yeah well i wasted idk how many hours fixing my myspace. And now its all pretty. Yeah. My eyes fucking kill. I was suppose to go out last night but no of course not. Couldnt. This is like the first weekend in forever that i havent done soemthing. Idk. I watched Dawsons Creek for like 3 hours this morning and after im done with this pointless thing that no one reads i will be resuming that. I think my mom is coming home early. Yippie. Not really. I wanna go the the movies.Theres so many movies i want to see but no. I have no money and my mom wont bring me anyway. Blah. 48 days. If you dont know to what then you're not my friend. Um. I think its 48. It'd be sad if it wasnt. Yeah. I quite hungry. Boy are stupid. I have math homework i should be doing but yeah im not going to. This is pointless. Adios.
Queso Queso.
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| Shhyyeaaah |
[01 Nov 2005|05:01pm] |
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mood |
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 embarrassed |
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music |
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Tv |
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I just reread a bunch of my journal entries and i've been talkking about steve for like over a month.
Yeah im obsessssed
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| Woot |
[01 Nov 2005|03:53pm] |
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mood |
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 crazy |
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music |
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Nothing |
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Today was awesome.
Had to turn in my bread for spanish.
It was hard as a rock.
Got candy in chem.
Passed my math test.
Then
Stayed after with Jess.
Walked to Dunkin Donuts with her.
Got foood.
And talked for awhile.
And we realized we had a lot in common.
...about a certain situation.
It was so weird.
So i had an aweeesome day.
And i get to see steve tomorrow.
And i showed jess what he looks like and she said he was cute.
So yeah at least people finally dont think people i like are ugglly.
Wooo.
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| sigh |
[31 Oct 2005|05:27pm] |
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mood |
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 nervous |
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music |
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wooo |
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I had a shockingly awesome day. I had idk sort of a bad morning. But that changed quickly. I dont know. I becoming more obsessed with steve everyday. And thats BAD.I cant get like this about a guy again. idk. I probably have no shot in the world. I told ravin i was gonna ask him out today. Obvioulsy i did not go through with it. It would kinda make me feel better because like if he says no which is like 98% likely then i wont need to like him anymore. But i could never do that. I have no confidence in myself. I feel like telling courtney or something. And maybe she'll blab it and then he'll find out and then idk. Probably get scared and run away and ask the teacher to get his seat changed. Yeah. He probably has a fucking girlfriend. Blah. I almost asked for his s/n but i chickened out. Idddk. Bowling on friday. Posssiblyyy. That should be interesting considering the people we're trying to get to go. I wish steve would go. That would be hott. Im trying to find someone hes friends with. I really am obsessed. Thats bad. I need to stop. I am going to be like wickedly depressed over this kid sooner or later. Oh wel i guess i ask for it. I should probably get less obsessed. Or i should work on it atleast. But hess so hott. And i havent had a boyfriend in forever. Blaaah. That'd be hott to start going out with someone on halloween. I think i'll try to tell Courtney in gym or something. Maybe write steves name all over my hand like i do everyday. Yeah that wont be obvious. Im such a fucking loser.
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| Im a jew. A fucking Jew. |
[28 Oct 2005|07:38pm] |
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I dont know. I hate how my mother never listens to me when i talk. I hate how she always interupts me. I hate it when i try to explain it to her she just interupts me again and starts yelling at me. I hate being jealous of all of my friends. I hate how guys think all my friends are pretty. I hate it how all my friends have boyfriends. I hate myself for not being pretty. I hate myself for not being able to make my mom happy. I hate myself for not being pretty enough for steve to like me. I hate myself for not getting over people. i hate everything. Blah i hope everyone dies.
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| okay |
[25 Oct 2005|04:29pm] |
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mood |
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 calm |
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music |
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The little introo music to the movie. |
] |
i just wrote like a whole entry and idk what happened to it..okay
So basically i went on about steve and how im getting to la la about this kidd and pretty soon hes gonna like get a girlfriend and my little world as we know it will be over.
Um therapy tomorrow.
Things are somewhat going okay.
Mark tried to eat my baby.
We had that thing today for varsity sports.
Fags.
Im going to go watch Kingdom of Heaven because orlando bloom is in it and hes hott.
Jessica is back.
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| We gave up we made up its not like you cared... |
[23 Oct 2005|12:17pm] |
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Well. Its been a weird couple days. We went to the football game on friday. That was..idk alright. Hung out with ravin courtney jess amanada and a few other people. Some interesting things happened. Nothing to do with me. But whatever. I took some pics. Yeah how interesting. Yesterday ravin and her familia picked me up at 1230 ish. We went around clifton park for awhile trying to find costumes for the halloween party. Didnt really work out too well. We saw some dude singing at the mall. Went back to ravins. Ate lunch. Got ready for the party. Left at like quarter after 4. Had to go to ravins sisters game at the highschool. Hung out with josh for like an hour. Left went to get ice cream. Got dropped off at the party a little before 7. Chilled there stuff happned that i can repeat. It kinda sucked. Got picked up at 11. Here i am. Idk. I was alerted at the football game that a certain someone like another someone and then i learned that to be true at the party last night. I guess i act like it doesnt bother me. But it does. Not sure why. But it just makes me feel like..if your like somewhat my friend then you wont do that. But what right do i have to say that because they can say that too. Its not like im the only one. Idk. We played games at the party. We played twister for all of 3 minutes. Then truth or dare. Then spin the bottle. There was alot of making out and it was just insane. I had a little bit of fun. But i guess ravin wasnt having the greatest of time. So i tried to make sure she was okay. Idk it was a big mess. Im not really aloud to repeat stuff that happned. So i wont. Idk. Right now im all blah. I like steve . I really like him. And the more i get all totally liking him then the easier it is for me to get sad. I just have to like tell myself that he doesnt like me, whether its true or not. Just some how make myself believe it and then if he doesnt like me it wont bother me that much and if he did then everything would be okay. But things dont work like that. I wish i was pretty. Theres times when i think i am. But them all you hear about it how all these guys think all these other girls are hott. And im just there. Idk why i get like this. The only reason they like them is probably cuz of the way they dress and they;re all fucking whores. Idk I think im going to go back to when i wore hoodys and baggy pants all the time. I think i was happy then. idk im so lost. I dont know how to make myself happy anymore. Nothing just ever works out right. i have so much homework to do and i cant even think staight. I feel so lonely. Everybody has somebody. Whether it be their best friend their boyfriend/gf brother sister whatever. I dont have a boyfriend. My best friend lives like and hour away and im alone in this tiny little house all the time. And i just sucks. I hate my mom i like when shes not here anyway. I just fucking hate life.
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| Busy busy. |
[21 Oct 2005|05:57pm] |
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mood |
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busy |
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music |
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Anti |
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Its 548. I have like 10 minutes to write this and i dont think im gonnna be able to but i'll try. Schools been okay. Its getting better. I had a couple really bad days. But its getting better. I have a totally crazy weekend. In like 30 minutes i'll be leaving to go get ravin and we're going to go to the football game against amsterdammm. Should be interesting. Old town against new town. Then im goin with ravin tomorrow to her sisters game? Possibly. Then im probably going to chill with her and we have to go buy some costume material for megan;s party. The get ready for that. And that starts at 730. So thats wear i'll be tomorrow night. Ravin wants to find some random guy to make out with. She wants me to find one to but idk lol. That should be cool. Im going as ravin. So yes i'll be the biggest whore there. Im bringing my camera tonight and tomorrow so i will have some good pictures. I heard rumors we're playing spin the bottle and like truth and dare and some other games. Lol. Yeah More details on that later. Then Sunday is all up in the air. Me and ravin were suppose to go to the mall all day and then hang out later that night but idk its all woo. So even if we dont do anything that will give me time to do allll my homework. And i have some gay history project to due. Funess. I cant figure out what to wear. Theres only like 8 months of school left. Hottness. 2 months and like two days until my biiiiiirthday. IDK im not that excited. But whatever. Im really ugly today. But i did have a rather good day at school. Steve gave me like 3 sheets of paper today in history and i was sniffing them in study hall. Haha. Me and my little study hall crew have came to realize that i am more obsessed with him then any other guy. With my luck i'll find out he has a girlfriend or will get one this weekend or something and i'll go into a deep state of depression.
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| And the kids are going crazy now. |
[11 Oct 2005|05:15pm] |
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mood |
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music |
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woooahh |
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I tend to you have these long gaps where i dont write anything. I guess i just havent had the time. Lets see its October 11th? That means it's ryan's birthday tomorrow. Shocking how i still remember things like that. Last time i wrote in here i was at paulas. Well what has happened since then.. I resumed to working only 1 day a week. So thats made my life easier. Angela is 16 and is driving. I hate her for it. I get her south park season 5 cuz im an awesome friend like that. I missed her birthday party because i had to work. I guess im doing okay in school. I got a 100 on my lab report. Im so cool. I brought my math grade up. So im doin okay. I read 4 books this past week. Im getting a new one tomorrow. I started reading this book called freaky green eyes. Which i read alot of it awhile ago but i dont really remember it. So i started it again. i read like four pages and then i remembered about this other book i started. And the whole thing was about these 3 guys and them turning gay so i read that yesterday. It was pretty interesting so im gonna get the sequel to that tomorrow and probably read that by friday and finish this freaky book over the weekend. If i have time that is. I have to take the PSAT's on saturday morning then go to work right after that. And work all day sunday too. So who knows. I should probably read that booklet think they gave me or the psats. Or nimsqwat. as ravin calls it. Speaking of her, im been hanging out with her alot lately. Well she lives right down the road so why not. Last night she called me at like..6? and asked me if i was hungry. Lol. So her mom invited over for dinner. And i hung out there until 8 something. That was cool. Me and her went to the dance last friday. Her mom took us. That was so much fun. I surprised myself. I hung out with jess alot. Me and her are becoming pretty good friends. Jackie if goin out with levi. Thats cool. I know she really liked him. I told her jeans equal forever love. lol. Im trying not to let my little mind think that much. Like..the whole. day dreaming thing. Because every time i do i get my little hopes up and then nothing happens that great so whatever. Im trying not to think about mr steve. Because im becoming completely obbbbsesssseddd with him. Which is completely saddd and im acting like a 6th grader. But whateverrrr. The hot freshmore wrote his number on ravins arm. She suppose to call him today so i'll be waiting for her phone call to hear about that. He was talking about her at lunch today. i got to hold his hoody too. Hah. Yeah i cant wait for lunch tomorrow. SHould be interesting. Um. Ms. A. is annoying me a ravin. probably more me because ravin is too nice to get mad. I have history tomorrow. Gah. Im so bad. I have to write a lab report and do my history and read some stupid chapter in english. Blerrrrgh. Dickhole is being..well just that but whatever. I guess im done with this long entry for now.
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| idk. |
[30 Sep 2005|07:10pm] |
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mood |
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 cranky |
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music |
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people talking |
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I never update anymore. Right now im at P and t's house. Yeah is so exciting. Im like in love in this kid in my history class but i know i have no chance. School has been pretty fuckin gay so far. I didnt really get any of the classes i wanted. which blows majorly. My mother have been fighting more than usual. I have like 4 friends. If that. Angela's birthday is on wed. She'll be 16. Lucky. I still have to get her present. Yikes. Its been 6 months. I try not to think about it. It really doesnt bother me. Somedays but not all. Im used to going only 5. But..Idk. Life is pretty fucking gay man. Theres so many problems going on with everyone.I have history monday. Im acting like a 5th grader. Sigh. I hate guys sometimes. My cell phone has 35 cents on it. So no one can really call. Even thou 3 people have today already and i cant answer. And someone left me a message..that i cant check. Exciting no? My eyes hurt. Im almost done with my book. I didnt realize it was about gay people but i guess when you look at the cover you can pretty much tell. Its like that thing with hard love. About gay people. Idk. Im really cold. Theres only 1 tv in this house. And they cook too much food. I get the house to myself tomorrow. Sexyness. I lost one of my rings. I think i'll cry. My foots asleep and im bored. No one is on. Well a couple people are. idk i really never talk to anyone on the computer anymore. I hardly ever IM anyone. I dont know why but i hate doing it. Oh well. If you really want to talk to me you'll do it yourself. Im thinking about someone who i havent talked to in awhile. Its really weird we talked for like one day for like hours and thats it. Idk i see them all the time in school. Maybe they hate me? Idk wouldnt be something out of the ordinary. Its not like im dying to be friends with this person. I dont even know that much about them. Whatever. People are gay. This computer sucks because i dont have my music on it. It took like 2 seconds to download aim. Im not used to computers that work i guess at a normal pace. Mine is a loser and goes below average. Idk what i just said. I ramble and i make no sense. Great people are here. Old people to be exact. Not people i know. I wonder if i'll have to talk to them. old people usually smell. Blah. I wish i hate some raspberries.
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| socks. |
[15 Sep 2005|06:28pm] |
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mood |
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creative |
] |
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music |
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nuutin |
] |
( swwah )
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| ..Will he graduate? |
[11 Sep 2005|12:08pm] |
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mood |
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cold |
] |
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music |
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Joshua Groban |
] |
Please excuse the subject. I didnt know what to write and i just heard that on the tv so its now the subject. So im doing better i guess. I had a little freak out on friday. I have those often. But im better now. I have to go into work at 2 today. An hour and a half before i have yo leave yippie. I did all of my homework thats due tomorrow. Im so proud of myself. I still have to do my history homework. I love that class. Um. I guess school isnt that bad. Its only the first week so we shall see. I hope it wont be as bad as last year. But we shall see. I have to go talk to my guidance counsler tomrrow. Um. I talked to peg and i guess i worked out all my problems at work. So im not quiting. I need the money. Badly. Hopefully i'll be able to get my car in the spring. My eyes really hurt. My mommy took me out to breakfast this morning. Me and her have been getting along good for the past couple of days. No fights. Im not going to call my father. I changed my mind. I dont want his money. If hes nice he send me more money on my birthday. But i'll be lucky if i get 100$ out of him. Anyway new topic. Ohh im sleepy. Eh. IDK. what to say. Maybe i'll do a survey :)
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| ... |
[09 Sep 2005|10:25pm] |
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mood |
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lonely |
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music |
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wah. |
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IDK. I had a somewhat okay day at school. But then my day got worse once i got to work and there was just so many problems. And i had another one of my freakouts. Idk. And i came home and got my clothes so that cheered me up. Idk now i feel quite hated. I mean i didnt even do anything to these people. I moved on. Got on with my life. And only the second day of school and im being acused of all this stuff i didnt do/say. And im sure this wouldnt bother me on a normal day but me and my mom keep fighting. And im stressing out and im like getting back into my depressed mode. And i promised myself i wouldnt be like that anymore. i wouldnt let people do this to me. But its been two fucking days and its already happening. I mean i worked so hard to be happy. 5 months people. Thats how long it took. And 2 days into school and im already freaking out. This shit already happened back in like april/may whatever. And im tired of it. i didnt do anything. I dont go around saying things people think i do. People just assume im this awful person and im not. Whats the point of trying. Why do people just hate me. Like what did i do. Just tell me. gaaaaaaaaaaaaah. Im really not that bad. Am i? I Blah i want to move. :(
Why can people do this to me.???
I think im going crazy.
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| Yes. No. I dont know. |
[08 Sep 2005|09:25pm] |
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mood |
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 bouncy |
] |
First day was today. Ewiee. School was okay. Im sure it couldve been worse. I talked to alot of people i didnt really plan on talking to and the ones i thought i might talk to didnt even say hi to me. So idk. I mean its so much different then it was june. Its really weird. Im trying to get a bunch of us to go the movies. It probably wont be to next week sometime because im working 3-c tomorrow and closing tomorrow and doing a all day thing on sunday. So idk. I might have to quit. Considering i had a freak out today. It wasnt that bad. But idk. No one is in any of my classes. Its quite sad. The bus is so crowded and took me forever to get there. I saw luke thou. That made me happy. :). Lovesss so confussing ....i have to expresssss how i feeeeel. One thing i knows true. I'll neverrrr replaceee youu. Teah thats britneys singing right there. Oh godddddd. I think i like him again.Im over sean. Probably because i havent seen him in forever. But hes talking to me again. I talked to him online...sorta. And he talked to me today and i almosted hugged him. Idk why i like him. Ugh im sooooo stupid.
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| Well is it. |
[07 Sep 2005|05:25pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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worried |
] |
| [ |
music |
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sex sex .....violence |
] |
Yesterday was probably one of the worst days ever. Ugh. Work. Almost quit. Idk it was really bad. Jackie tried to calm me down. So did her dad. It didnt really work. Matt knew there was something wrong but idk. I didnt really want to talk to him about it because i was in a really bad mood. Im better now. I guess. Talked to the woman about it today. And about tomorrow. I really dont want to go back. I mean really really dont want to. Ugh i cant believe school is tomorrow. Its really not sinking in. Im gonna be so bad tomorrow. I keep stressing out about everything. Work and my mom and now school i just cant handle this. These days are going by so quickly. It just sucks. My stomach feels so weird. Im like wicked nervous and idk why. Blah. I've worked so hard to be happy. And its really going to suck if when i walk into school tomorrow that it'll just disappear.
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| Love <33 |
[05 Sep 2005|01:01pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 blah |
] |
Love is just another word for pain
It's a broken record repeating the same
thing
When you want it it's not there
When you have it you don't
care
When i lose it in the end...
The heartbreak, the heartache is more than i wanted
We gave up, we made
up
It's not like you cared
Deception, Depression is all that i've
got
And but who said love was fair
And i've made up my mind
I'd be better off alone
Love is just a waste of
time
And all the lonely nights
And all the crushing scenes
And all the
pointless fights
Someone tell me what it means
Someone tell me why hearts break
Cuz
sometimes i think this thing called love is another word for pain
And i'm
giving up on happy endings
The one's that are only in movies
Where the guy
gets the girl and everybody's happy
I think that's the way it should be
The heartbreak, the heartache is more than i wanted
We gave up, we made
up
It's not like you cared
Deception, depression is all that i've
got
And but who said love was fair
And i've made up my mind
I'd be
better off alone
Love is just a waste of time
And all the lonely
nights
And all the crushing scenes
And all the pointless
fights
Someone tell me what it means
Someone tell me why hearts
break
Cuz sometimes i think this thing called love is another word for
pain
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| P-S-Y-C-H-O |
[04 Sep 2005|09:46pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
crazy |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Wooo |
] |
Yeah. So i just realized i have no money on my phone so no one can even call my phone. Not like anyone does..or knows the number. Yeah.. Im on the phone with angela. We're trying to figure out how to get her text messaging on her little phoney thing. I think jackie is coming over tomorrow. Maybe i'll see sean :) I didnt get to see him today. I made alot in tips today :). Yeah 4 days. Tear. I get to watch dawsons creek tomorrow. Sweetness. I got my new clothes XD. Im still waiting for the online ones. Josh Groban tshirt<33. Sexiness. Just like my elbows. My eyes really hurt so im gonna stop now. I love you jordan.
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| Love Sucks |
[03 Sep 2005|10:28pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
good |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
josh has a pretty voice. |
] |
So its time for another one of my sappy little entries. I doubt anyone actually reads this except like the two people i know do. Oh well. Yeah so I've been working non stop. When i get my paycheck for next week i'll have 700 dollars. Woot. Umm. Sean has been coming into work alot. Omggggg is he hottt. Yeah we talked on thursday for awhile. Siggggh. im talking to fat boy again. Or craig. Whatever you prefer to call him. I cant believe school is starting on thursday ick. And i have to see them too. Ew just thinking about them makes me wanna puke...naaasty. Yeaaaah its 1025. I may have to cut this short later incase jboy calls. But who knows. Yeah. I had alot to say but i guess i dont. Oh well. Heres to being happy for 3 weeks on monday. And im not gonna let anyone fuck that up :).
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